BUSH WILL NOMINATE JUDGE WAPNER TO SUPREME COURT
By Colleen Smith, staff reporter
Now
that Justice Sandra Day O'Connor has announced her retirement from the US
Supreme Court, speculation as to who will replace her is rampant. Many are sure
that he will nominate an ultra-rightist, and that democrats in the Senate will
fight him. There is a lot of doubt as to whether the seat will be filled by the
first Monday in October when the high court convenes. According to White House
aide Jeffery Mathers, who spoke with me over cocktails at a D.C. area bar, the newest Supreme Court
Justice will be someone we will all recognize. Judge Joseph A. Wapner of The People's Court
and Animal Court Fame is President Bush's first choice.
"The
President is convinced that everybody likes Judge Wapner," said Mathers. "The President says
that those
commie pinko hippie liberal democrats in the Senate wouldn't dare say no to
Wapner because he is popular, and that Wapner would do what the president says,
because President Bush nominated him.
I asked my source, who always tells me things if I get a few drinks in him and flirt a little, if the president had considered Wapner's advancing age. He is over 80 years old, and only started doing TV after retiring from the bench in real life. Mathers replied that someone had brought that up, and was promptly dressed down by Karl Rove and Dick Cheney for "back talk". "Anyone who has been at this White House long knows you don't tell the president he is wrong. You don't even think it! This guy was new. After a long and uncomfortable silence, President Bush said that if Wapner turns him down, He will ask Judge Judy.