WORST ORANGE BOWL HALFTIME SHOW EVER

by Matthew Brown, Publisher

This year, they didn't lip-sync, and it showed. They were terrible. Kelly Clarkson, Trace Adkins and Ashlee Simpson were the halftime entertainment. The show got off to a bad start as Clarkson's wireless mic was dead. A roadie came out shouting "Test one two," and handed her a wired microphone. Whoever was running the mixing board was doing a horrible job. The sound was flat, as if only one channel of a stereo recording. The vocals were too low, and the bass too loud.

Country artist Trace Adkins was next. Except for the canned vocals on the chorus, no one could hear him. On camera, he was visibly amused by the whole farce. Last, and least came Ashlee Simpson. Her entire appearance was a rip-off of Joan Jett. Come to think of it, Kelly Clarkson had been a bit punk herself. I guess since Avril Lavigne has sold a few records, girl punk is the in fad. They even had the anarchy symbol on a big fake bass drum.

As the performance neared a welcome conclusion, Ashlee Simpson was screaming, and sounded awful. She had cast her stage monitor ear pieces aside, and probably could not tell how bad she sounded. The Saturday Night Live fiasco suggested that she could not sing. This proved it.

After it was all over, the audience booed. I have never heard a halftime performance booed before. To sum it all up, this was the worst musical performance at a sporting event since Roseanne sang the National Anthem at a San Diego Padres game. Even Ozzy Osbourne's rendition of  Take Me Out To The Ball Game at Wrigley Field has been eclipsed.

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